Nicole Arbour and Dear Fat People

The woman above is “comedian” Nicole Arbour from Canada and she has become a major topic for talk around the world.  She posted a video on September 3, 2015 criticizing fat people.  In her video she rants and raves about fat people.  Anyone obese to her is a problem with society.  Nicole Arbour talks about how she supposedly loves all people even fat people despite the fact she won’t stop complaining about them.  How Arbour starts out the video with questioning whether her “Katy Perry” hair is full of hair spray or semen.  She may be a comedian but if she can’t make a better joke than a sex joke to start her video there is something wrong.  This is saying something because my choice of humour is very immature.

Nicole Arbour’s Video Dear Fat People

Before I talk anything about this video I want to make a quick preface.  When I originally saw this video I thought “hey, this would be great to talk about on my blog.”  But as I got to thinking about it I started to wonder if that would be true.  Writing about the video Dear Fat People will get personal.  Then I realized that writing about it is exactly what I should write about.

My Rant About Nicole Arbour

Nicole Arbour claims to be making this degrading, and yes it is degrading, video about how she thinks fat shaming people who are obese will help them realize where they are and make them change for the better.  My first issue with this is that she says she is only talking to people who are obese and not those with a little extra “pushin’ for the cushion.”  I am big but I am not more than what most people would consider an extra pushin’ for the cushion.  I don’t weight a hundred pounds over where I should weigh, I don’t even weigh 75 pounds over the maximum healthy weight.  In fact, I only weigh about 30-35 lbs over the maximum healthy weight for someone my age and height.  America’s standards for appropriate weight are extremely high, making it hard for anyone to feel like they are meeting the standards.

People who are overweight may need a kick in the keister to start losing weight.  I know I needed it.  But it should come from friends or family in a comforting and safe environment.  Having some random lady who is what many people would consider the ideal body image start tearing apart your body image and problems you may have can be extremely detrimental.

Nicole Arbour's body.
This is what Nicole Arbour looks like for reference.

A brief side note: The above picture comes from GF King Gluten Free.  On this blog Nicole Arbour is praised for being a leading force and a role model for those looking to better themselves.  According to the blog, after an accident Arbour became allergic to gluten.  Arbour wants to stop bullying and make people happier.  It can very well be said that this video is bullying.  Shaming is nothing less than bullying.

I was lucky enough to have that conversation from my aunt.  I had thought about starting this blog before that but after she talked to me and help me realize my weight issues I knew I had to start this blog and lose weight.  The conversation hurt but it wasn’t because of what she was telling me, it was because I was realizing that I needed to change my diet, increase my exercise, and overall improve on what I was calling “working out”.   The combination just wasn’t cutting it.

When you are larger people tend to not think of you as capable.  Despite my size I was completely able to handle myself and could run after someone if needed with no problem.

Fat shaming people is exactly that.  Shaming people because of their size.  It isn’t making them realize that they need to make a change, it is you using their size to get a laugh.  Get new material Nicole Arbour.  This isn’t just a request.  Nicole’s material which some might claim is a joke, comes off serious.  The seriousness of this material can be extremely hurtful.

to cause to feel shame; make ashamed.
~Reference.com definition of shaming.

With that definition of shaming it becomes obvious that shaming is meant to make someone feel bad.  It is not the process of helping someone to come to changes in their life.  You can criticize someone without the need to make them feel ashamed or guilty.  You want to instill motivation in them to make a better them.  Not trigger them to feel hurt.

The hurt doesn’t stop there though.  Nicole released a second video.  This one just as bad as the first one.

Nicole Arbour’s Most Offensive Video EVER

This video she not only talks about fat people but she also talks about a people who are wanting to be less hurtful on the internet.  She claims that “keyboard warriors” don’t understand comedy and need to stop getting hurt by what others say on the internet.  She goes as far as to say that keyboard warriors are terrorists.

I am a firm believer that in some instances and ways political correctness is hurting our society.  But just because you don’t have to be politically correct all the time doesn’t mean that you should go out looking to hurt someone’s feelings.  I believe the kind of videos that Nicole Arbour submitted with the Most Offensive Video Ever and Dear Fat People are completely inappropriate.

Not everyone can get miraculously thin.  She says that she doesn’t mean to shame people with medical conditions in her first video but in her second video she talks about how people claim thyroid problems and that isn’t an excuse for being overweight.  News flash Nicole Arbour for some people that means they will be overweight.  While not every person with thyroid problems will be overweight some will be.  For them it is harder to process food than for others.

Now after all this is said, I won’t presume to think that you haven’t had your own share of problems Nicole Arbour.  You may have been in a car accident and had problems stemming from that.  Your problems come from a source that you were able to identify and catch early on.  Not everyone is that lucky.  And not everyone is so lucky as to have it be something that happens to them, some people are born with genes to be larger than others.

How about instead of fat shaming someone you give them the tools to realize the change that needs to be made and correct it.  How about you talk a little bit about your own challenges.  You never know when you look at someone what challenges they might be undergoing.  You also don’t know if they are trying to lose weight.  The process is not instantaneous and your video might actually hurt someone’s motivation to continue their weight loss program.

I am not the only one to find this video offensive or hurtful.  There are a lot of people who have responded to this in both blog format and video format.  With so many people against the video it is no wonder that Nicole Arbour has disabled the comments on Youtube for Dear Fat People.  Nicole Arbour disabled comments after getting tired of deleting ones that she didn’t like.  YouTube personality Whitney Way Thore who is overweight claims to have had multiple comments deleted by Arbour (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2YYZBrPwwU).  The video Most Offensive Video EVER has more dislikes than likes.  It is the first time I have seen so many dislikes compared to likes (9,821/55,159).  People on the internet can finally agree on something.

Here are just a few of the responses I found and liked.